In my job I have the privilege of running across numerous people throughout the day and today I had the opportunity to speak with a doctor in the south suburbs who presented me with a very interesting thought. She said far too often people get married because they want to get marriage but they don't want the impending marriage that comes with it.
I've been in a lot of weddings this year and thankfully I can say the couples I've witnessed get married truly seem to value the concept of marriage much more than the ceremony.
What do you think?
I think this is a very true statement. I think people get married for the wrong reasons these days. They do it because they've been together a long time or they're at the age where they should be married. I think that they look past the work required to have a long term successful marriage. It takes a lot of work as I've witnessed my parents do it successfully for 29 years. It's an interesting thought though...
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Well I guess I will leave a comment. My father and stepmother have been married for 30 years. Those years were not without ups and downs, but the one constant was the relationship with God. Most people who get married nowadays don't have a strong relationship with God. If you don't truly value God, whom you don't see, how can you value your mate, whom you lay your eyes on everyday. Even if the person didn't respect his or her mate enough to stay and work it out, then respect for God and his love of marriage ought to make the person work it out. Futhermore, when a person is single, that time should be used to develop the relationship with God. --Dee
Thanks for the comment..
hmmmm...this is a great topic. I've always wanted to get married but it wasn't until I met my now fiance that I wanted a marriage. It takes a lot of work and while the planning of a wedding is both fun and stressful I think people need to understand that the real work begins the next day as you plan to spend your lives together. There will be ups and downs (and not just in the bedroom) but when you say I do you are making a vow to that person, yourself and to God.
I agree completely with anonymous.
I have seen the results of couples becoming so engulfed in the planning of a wedding while seceretly the bride told me in a specific situation "im just gonna use this engagement time to get ready cuz im not now." this person even was unfaithful during this time in efforts to "become ready" just a disaster!
what i know is that when you get in a serious relationship, at this age it could possibly lead to marriage. so use the dating/courting time to get all your questions answered and figure out if this person is an ideal mate for you. then when you get to the point where your sig other brings up marriage at least you have already most importantly prayed and received confirmation that this is your God given mate, but that you also have discussed important information that is neccessary to know for the next 50 years!!! If someone is not God- fearing, then you have to wonder will they be faithful bc they only fear what i will do if i find out OR will they be faithful bc they do not want to disappoint their vow to God and the person he sent them... important things to do in advance...this way there is nothing to fix, figure out, or repair and you actually can focus on the ceremony bc you have a solid union!!!
Hi Jeff, Niela referred me to this blog and I am so glad that she did! This topic jumped out at me!!!! Marriage is always a hot topic. I host various events for married couples and single women desiring to be married through my organization Woman2Woman! We discuss topics on having a godly marriage vs. the worlds view on marriage, which is the wedding, the contract, etc. My opinion on marriage is that... Marriage is a covenant unto God symbolic to the church that Christ gave his life for! (Ref. Ephesians 5:22-32) That makes this marriage thing a very serious matter to Him and all who embrace in the BENEFITS of marriage should honor it the way that God ordains! Husbands loving their wives as Christ loved the church and wives submitting to this love, as you have been set aside just for your husband, just as Christ did for His church! I feel that if we embrace the covenant of marriage that we will forget all about an extravagant wedding!!!! Hire God first as your marriage planner instead of a wedding planner!!! For LOL...
"far too often people get married because they want to get marriage but they don't want the impending marriage that comes with it. "
She hit the nail on the head. Many people get married because they feel its "the right time". But that kind of thinking is why the divorce rate is so high, and there are so many marriages where the people are barely able to speak to each other.
As westerners the best way for us to look at marriage is first the way the Bible tells us, second for love, and third as a business merger. I think that all 3 of these are very important. W/o God your marriage won't last and means nothing. You have to love your spouse to truly experience the joys of marriage. Everyone will not learn to love their mate...so its best to start out with romantic love that can evolve into other forms. And lastly, the same way you wouldn't merge your business with another "just because you like them" you shouldn't merge your life with another just because you love them. You have to make sure that the merger will compliment both of you. Two coming together as one should mean positive things for both parties. Everyone that's in love shouldn't be in a relationship together.....
Good difference in marriages..
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